noise complaint

so.  my neighbors are against me.

I come home to find a noise complaint from the office on my door.  I go down there and say "WTF?!"  no, not exactly, I used nicer words than that, but that's what I wanted to say.
I was told multiple neighbors have complained about the noise coming from my apartment.  specifically crying.

so I say, "Listen, I will not give in to my child just so he'll be quiet and not have a tantrum.  I'm not that kind of parent."
"well, you need to be respectful of those around you."
"yea, I get that.  its tight quarters; we all have to deal with each other.  but isn't this a family community?!"

and back and forth we went.  sigh.

I know who it was too.  I am neighbors with a borderline crazy cat lady.  you should hear her talk to these cats ... which btw, this complex does not allow pets.  just saying.

my complaint also mentioned one of my children running around naked outside.
c'mon people!
inappropriate is if I did that, not my 3 year old.

why couldn't she/they come to me first?  I got no "neighborly" warnings, not even dirty looks to my face.
I hate the word hate ... but I strongly dislike people who have nothing better to do than to find something to complain about.

boo on you crazy cat lady.

the end.

flowing emotions

Just standing in the shower can get therapeutic, no?  Especially when its cold out, all I want to do is take a hot-as-I-can-take-it shower.

It's a good place to sing, a good place to cry, a good place to pray, a good place to  talk to yourself ... yea I do that.

And usually, almost as soon as I begin to enjoy the hot water coming down on me, I watch the water go down the drain and begin to think of those that can't do what I do.  The people that go to the river to get their water in order to bathe, to drink, to wash their clothes, to cook with, etc.  Which let me tell you, doesn't help the emotional side of things.

just sayin'


When I woke up this morning, I asked myself, "What is life about?"

I found the answer in my room ...

the fan said, "be cool"

the roof said, "aim high"

the window said, "see the world"

the clock said, "every minute is precious"

the mirror said, "reflect before you act"

the calendar said "be up to date"

the door said, "push hard for your goals"

the floor said, "kneel down and pray"

Meet Me on Monday

do THIS, link up, and get to know your readers :)

I can't stand when someone ...
Lies!  and if you tell the truth, but intentionally leave something out, that counts too.  just don't do it!

Do you do daily, weekly, or monthly grocery shopping?
I usually go weekly ... but seem to still find myself at the store 2-3 days a week anyway.  I forget that darn list!

What kind of car do you drive?
black '98 Honda Accord ... don't get too excited

Crunchy or soft tacos?
crunchy please!  funny though, because I love burritos and that's more or less and bigger soft taco, right?

What's the habit you are proudest of breaking?
I have to say, I am pretty proud to have quite smoking cold turkey.  THE SECOND I found out I was pregnant, I stopped and never looked back.

your turn.

Don't be afraid to FAIL

Walt Disney was fired by a newspaper editor because "he lacked imagination and had no good ideas."  Disney went bankrupt several times before he built Disneyland.  In fact, the proposed park was rejected by the city of Anaheim, CA on the grounds that it would only attract "riffraff."

Thomas Edison's teacher said he was "too stupid to learn anything."  He was fired from his first 2 jobs for being "nonproductive."  As an inventor, Edison made more than 1,000 unsuccessful attempts to invent the light bulb  When a reporter asked him how it felt to fail 1,000 times, Edison said that he didn't fail all those times, but that the light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.

Albert Einstein did not speak until he was 4 years old and did not read until he was 7.  His parents thought he was "subnormal," and one of his teachers described him as "mentally slow, unsociable and adrift forever in foolish dreams."  He was expelled from school.

Every cartoon Charles Schultz, creator of the comic strip Peanuts, submitted to the yearbook staff at his high school was rejected.

After Fred Astaire's first screen test, the memo from the testing director of MGM, dated 1933, read, "Can't act.  Can't sing.  Slightly bald.  Can dance a little."  Astaire kept that memo over the fireplace in his Beverly Hills home.

Decca Records turned down a recording contract with The Beatles with this fascinating evaluation: "We don't like their sound.  Guitar groups are on their way out."

Auditioning a singer named Reg Dwight in the 1960's, shoved him out of the office saying "you're wasting my time!"  That singer is now better known as Elton John.

What if none of these people failed?  What then?

did someone say chocolate?

I LOVE sweets, but not just sugar, chocolate sweets specifically.  I can actually control myself when it comes to candy, but when is comes to chocolate, I'm completely weak.

and so my mother, the one I inherited this curse blessing from, gave me this recipe.  I wanted to share because I know I've heard of it before and was skeptical, but I am here to say that it works.  AND I INSIST YOU TRY IT!

5 minute chocolate mug cake
4tbsp flour
4tbsp sugar
2tbsp cocoa
1 egg, beaten
3tbsp milk
3tbsp oil
3tbsp chocolate chips, marshmallows, nuts or whatever else you think might work ... this is optional
splash of vanilla extract
1 large coffee mug, microwaveable safe

Add dry, mix
Add egg, mix
Add milk & oil, mix
Add vanilla, mix
3 minutes in your microwave
** This is intended for a 1000 watt microwave.  For another wattage, the time will vary **


a new day ... yesterday

I did a few new things yesterday, so it keeps kind of a special feeling with me.
well not exactly new new, but things I haven't done in what seems like forever!!  For example -

  • I held a 10 day old baby girl.  she was beautiful, and I could've cried because of it.  It took me by surprise that I sort of forgot hold to hold a squishy baby.  She was alert, watching me.  Even though she knew I wasn't mama, she was content.
  • I filed my DBA and paid for the publication saying my business has officially arrived and I'm legit.  that is scary ... mostly because if someone called me to do actual work, I'd freak, but I will try to just stay excited about it.  ps.  check out my other blog ... that's what I do.
  • I bought a dress.  I stopped by Ross on my way home, and ladies if you are in the market, summer items are on the clearance racks.  I suppose most stores will be doing that now, making room for sweaters, jeans, and winter jackets.  I got a dress that is dark denim blue (but NOT denim, because that would be along the lines of hideous).  If I actually wear it, I may or may not post it ... wearing it will be another exceptional day because dresses aren't exactly my thing.

and today ...

  • someone gave me a bed in GREAT condition, along with head/foot board.  that same someone also gave me a dinning table & 4 chairs.  AND delivered it all to me.
  • my neighbor gave me a perfect all-in-one tool box; a perfect tool set for a girl.  basic, not complicated :)

its easy to feel like I'm doing something right when all these blessings come my way ... I hope thats the truth.  I have no doubts whatsoever, and that feels good too.

how was your day?

ER visits

the school year just started, and Sam has stayed home sick once and I have been to the doctor with Elliott once.  this is our first year in the school and honestly, I'm afraid of what's coming.  we will most definitely be getting our flu shots soon!  will you?

I just read an article in my Costco magazine about when to take your child to the ER.
(Just a reminder for you super-moms!)

A - Airway.  Is your child choking?
B - Breathing.  Is there difficulty or struggle to breathe?
C - Circulation & Consciousness.  Can you stop the bleeding?  body going limp?
D - Disability & Dehydration.  Walking normally?  Vomiting & diarrhea without keeping down fluids?
E - Environmental Exposure. Includes things like: electric shocks, burns, frostbites, heat-related illness or trauma.

If you're unsure, better safe than sorry!!
If you are uninsured like so many of us are, find a 24/7 nurse hotline ready to go.

step 1: realizing you have a problem

there is a reason I have not picked up my camera in ages, but that storm cloud that consistently follows me around has taken away all my light.  and then that a-ha hits ... why in the world would I want to document this season of my life?  the IT, the problem, seems to be this certainty of the unexpected, of the stress, of that depressive cloud that I pretend is not there.  I don't have IT all together.

its so ugly.
with a dash of optimism, but little hope.
where my smile is forced because 2 little somebodies are watching.

I'm not in a total slump.  I do smile naturally still.  I have my kids; we have cozy beds & food in the fridge. there are of course many things to be thankful for, and I can name them all.

going through the motions of everyday life, when emotionally you want to cry every last tear and then scream as loud as you possibly can, it a difficult task most days.  do you know this feeling?

having these 2 littles are motivation enough.  they are worth it all, without a doubt.
intellectually I can tell you that that alone is enough to pick up the camera.  my ugliness should not/does not take away from them being the silly & cute kids they are and that I ought to taking pictures of that silliness & cuteness.  right?  right?!
but emotionally, its just plain difficult.  I carry my camera around with me, and usually come home realizing I still didn't take one.  and its a digital!  its not like its a waste of film anymore.

so, it just is what it is right now.  its a bummer, but somehow although I'm the only one to change it, I cannot.  its a strange place to be in.


do you remember your first crush?
I remember thinking Stephen was cute (so cute!) in the 3rd grade, and I was so sad to have to move away at the end of that school year and be away from him ... although I can't ever remember saying 2 words to him.

love is funny that way, right?

my Samuel is in 2nd grade, and has informed me of some rather big news -
"mom, I almost married a girl at school today"
"really?  does she know about this?"
"no.  but she's so beautiful!"
"did you get a name?"
"her name is Faye and she looks like she's from China"

hahahahahahahahaha!  gotta love kids.

"well does she speak Chinese?"
"she is probably just as American as you are."
"she's so beautiful.  she wears these little red heart earrings."
"does she know how much you like her?"
"no, but maybe you could buy some flowers for me to give to her.  what do you say?"
"I say, why don't you draw her a picture of some flowers?"
"mooooooom, no way."
"let's give this some time.  school just started 2 weeks ago."
"I'm gonna try and sit next to her tomorrow."

I totally missed back to school night due to illness, which also means I missed my chance to meet this future daughter-in-law, along with her parents.  I've heard of high school sweethearts, but ... funny to think about Sam growing up, getting married, and making me a grandma.  although I do mention it to him from time to time so he kind of gets it ... but then again, not really.

wish me luck!

$1 store

I have a new love for the $1 store.  When I was in Hawaii last year, there were no $1 stores!!  what is a cheap frugal mom to do?!
The one in my neighborhood is a bigger one.  love that.

here are my usuals - 
1 gal of Crystal Geyser water ... now I have seen this for .88 @ SaveMart BUT its very rare.
SUN powder detergent ... I have seriously gotten 10 loads from 1 box.
Soft Soap ... the individuals, not the refill bottles.  I normally buy this soap at whatever store I'm shopping at; it works the best for my drying hands.
Suave kids shampoo/body wash 2 in 1
raspberry popsicles ... 8 in a box.  yum.
sweet potatoes fries ... I have attempted to make these from scratch and they NEVER turn out right, so I have decided just to buy them from now on!
individual raisins boxes ... perfect for school lunches.
they had great school supplies there too ... notebooks, rulers, pencils, erasers, folders, pens, and lots more. 
a broom!  ... only bought one so far

did you know the $1 store has a CLEARANCE section?!
most of it is returned merchandise without the original packaging.  everything is .25 - .75 in there!!

what do you buy from the $1 store?

2nd grade

school started today.  yes, on a Wednesday.
not sure if its an effort to help everyone get used to the schedule without all 5 days dragging on, or ..... ???

last year we homeschooled.  this year is the exact opposite; off to public school.
he's always asked to go to school, so he was very excited this day has finally come.

he was nervous and practically skipped breakfast, which he NEVER does.  I tried not to make a big deal out that, and just keep him excited about the day.

I took another picture of him next to the school sign out front of the office.
(he's in 2nd grade; next year I might not get so lucky with the pictures! )
but I told him to meet me here - at the sign - after school.  "ok mom."

so 2:10 comes around and I wait.  and wait.  and wait.
there is a large crowd as soon as the bell rings, and soon enough, everyone finds where they need to be.
the after school program in the cafeteria begins.  the buses leave.  teachers are closing their doors.
where is Sam?
not at the sign.  not in his classroom.  not on the playground.  not in the office.  not in the cafeteria.

so I'm doing laps around school property and can't find him anywhere.
my stress has been high lately, and I'm doing my best to stay calm; keeping the tears back.
I decide to get some help at the main office.  I start talking and instantly my voice shakes and the tears roll.  

all along I knew in my gut that wherever Sam was, he wasn't freaking out.  I knew he was not kidnapped or anything ... but don'tcha HATE that little voice that tries to tell you you just might be?

so I get the help of a few staff members.  it took another good 10 minutes, and finally, he appears.
we was (technically) off school property.  waiting in a spot that we never even suggested, but somehow, his brain reasoned this was the spot.

he saw I was/had been crying, and gave me a big hug.  the staff had a few words for him, but really, they handled it all very well.  not sure if because it was the first day of school, or that they are always like that, but I was pleased they didn't assume the role of lecturing parent.

I've been saying to my family, friends, and to myself, that once we get on this new school schedule, a lot of things will work itself out.  that has been my focus for awhile, but I never thought there would be THIS kind of work to get there.


the worst is over.  today is a new day.
and now, Sam definitely knows to meet me at the sign.

name song

I saw this on Pinerest and thought ... YES!  someone, somewhere feels my pain.

is your name in a song?
growing up, I would hear "my song" often.  the people who usually sing it to me are older men.
its cute, but back then, it just wasn't cool ... like I had some kind of reputation to uphold.

I'm from the mid-west, so maybe that has something to do with these old men so willingly start up an acapella in the middle of whatever they are doing when they hear my name.

I would still be embarrassed, but I would smile so big if some old man sang to me like they used to.  of course this song dates back to 1918, so everyone that knows it may be dead.  just sayin'.

here's some HISTORY on k-k-k-katy

in case you're not familiar ... here's "my song"
and THIS GUY ... who must love a Katie


since before moving in, my boys have wanted a pet.  we've had dogs in the past, and once we had a bird, but long story short, we've been pet-less for some time now.
I'm still convinced a dog is just like having another kid, so no thank you on that.  plus, I can't have *real* pets in this apartment anyway.

I've been wanting to get the boys a hamster.  I had one as a kid, and loved it ... *cough* until it bit me *cough* ...  I love the tunnels you can set up for them, and especially the ball they can roll around on the floor in.  they're not too big to be a *real* pet ... shhhhhhhh, don't tell, ok?

my other not *real* pet I said we could get is a beta fish.  I have a tall glass vase and some blue/green glass pebble thingys already, so all we needed was the fish and some food.  easy.
so it took the boys forever to pick one out.  they were all SO COOL to them.  they would have bought them all if they could ... Sam knows that you can only have one, otherwise they will fight till the death, so of course he wanted to buy them all and begin the beta-WWI.

we finally decide on one; he's blue with some red on those pretty fins.  Sam wanted to name him "Big Fins."  he's so funny.  I liked it, but told him we ought to wait a day or two to officially decide.

so we get home and I fill the vase with water and add him in his jar to acclimate to the temperature before just dumping in.  after a few minutes, in his goes.  
well, I had added a bit too much water.  it was a balancing act; the water was right at the top.  and since beta's are not so excitable fish and like to sit and do next to nothing, I tip the vase ever so slightly to get rid of some of that extra water, and wouldn'tcha know it?!  that fish was right at the top and went flying down the water slide into the kitchen sink.

where the garbage disposal is.


I screamed.  and the boys come running.
"Mom, what did you do?!"

as much as it gives me the heebie-geebies, I knew I had to reach in there and try to get him out.  I HAD TO ... especially after the traumatizing cat incident.  there was no way we could go through another pet death, in any fashion!

so I'm digging in there.  and its gross.  and have you seen Final Destination?  yea, I'm thinking of that.  and suddenly I feel the fish, and he jumps in there, and he's slimy, and I scream, and I could not grasp him, and so I have to feel around some more since I KNOW he's close and still alive.

minutes and minutes and minutes go by.  I thought he was a goner.  I thought I'd have to put him out of his misery and flip that garbage disposal switch. the boys were crying and my heart is breaking for them - sorry fish, I felt bad for my kids, not you.

Sam gets control of himself and I ask him to stick his hand in there since its smaller and sure enough, he got out that little fish in about 30 seconds.  I cannot believe he was alive!

stupid fish.  what were you thinking?!

so back in the vase he goes.  swimming just fine.  he hasn't eaten much today yet, so maybe he's still a bit freaked out, but alive none-the-less.

"Sam, I think we should name him LUCKY"
"good idea Mom!"

meet Lucky -

head and heart

I have to unload in a list; its seems this is how my brain will catch up with my heart ....
  • I was blessed by sofas tonight.  yes used, but who cares?!  they were delivered, but more importantly, free.  my place is instantly more home-y.
  • I am unintentionally developing a cleaning business on the side.  didn't see that coming because I don't really enjoy cleaning.  apparently everyone else hates it too, which is why they want someone else to do it.  whatever, its money.  come to think of it, Renew the View works for cleaning too, doesn't it?  oooooo, I think I like where this could go.
  • but really, I NEED a real, steady, consistent job.  I wish I could go on like this until what I WANT to do happens, but that is fantasy.  I think I'm feeling guilty; I hate to be a mooch on anyone.
  • this year is 1/2 over already ... not sure I've accomplished 1 of my resolutions.  boo on me.
  • since I'm now broke, I have kept my same razor for awhile ... 2 thumbs up for Venus!  makes me think I could have kept other refills for a lot longer, because those suckers are expensive!  and btw, I'm totally converting to using a shampoo or conditioner to shave with over any shaving creme.  have you ever tried it?  you should.
  • I have lost inspiration to pick up my camera anymore.  I hate to have lost this motivation, because I know that I don't take totally crappy photos ... no offensive ... but I can't seem to get IT back; whatever IT is.  why, why, why?
  • not sure how I found the time, but I read a book ... in a matter of a few days.  soooooo not like me.  guess I found out something new about me.  it was a story about a female cabbie in England who [tries to] handle 5 lovers.  its not a detailed romance novel with a Fabio cover, but a love story none-the-less.  it could have easily been made into a movie.   I'm so not interested in having that life, yet I loved to read about it.  what does that mean?!
  • I am really happy getting reconnected with people I had relationships with when I lived here a few years ago.  they don't like to hear of my circumstances, but still, I feel they still have their arms open for me.   thank you friends.
  • Sam just had a night terror ... its been 3 months since his last one.  not sure what was different about today.  those are just plain not fun.
  • my to-do list is still so long.  I was seeing progress, but the list is added to and added to and has become a million miles long again.  I wish I could live on 2 hours of sleep for awhile ... but that still might not be enough.  sigh.

  • someone say a prayer for me.   thank you.

wiener, winner ... same thing

I was notified awhile ago but it seems I had to wait for it to come in the mail to believe it ... I won a blog giveaway!  whoo hoo!

$100 gift card to Dicks ... which we don't have here in my NorCal town.  the closest one is 2+ hours away.  but who cares?!  I won!

can't remember why I entered ... blogs that do giveaways want you to enter a bazillion times - follow me here, like me there, comment 500 times for 600 entries ... I can't keep up.  in fact, I've quit.  its just not fun anymore.

BUT ...
you can't win if you don't play!!  that I am thoroughly convinced of.
and ... I won!!  I won!!

thanks to VodkaMom!!!
which by the way, I love this blog.
you are a great writer.  I enjoy your sense of humor.  and I like that you reveal some of the real you on your blog.

(my 2 cents for bloggers ... all business is no fun.  if that's all you do, you must be a robot.  and boo to that.)

Aloha Friday

so I may not be living in Hawaii anymore
but I will keep as much aloha with me as I can.

Over at An Island Life, Kailani keeps it simple.
we all need more simplicity, right?!

Go visit and join the bloggy fun!

My question for you ...
Have you ever been to Hawaii?
tell me what you did there
what was your favorite thing about your trip?

for me - 
my favorite thing of the islands is that blue blue blue water.
I'd always seen the pictures, but for whatever reason, I thought it was doctored.
nope, the water REALLY looks like that.
blue is my favorite color, so it REALLY took my breath away!

Enjoy your weekend!

un-potty training

... kind of like an un-schooling approach.

looking back, I think I did it all wrong with my first son.  I tried candy, but I think that just officially turned on his sweet tooth.  I tried a sticker chart, and he was nothing but destructive with it; peeling all the stickers off to put everywhere and anywhere else but back on the chart. I then tried pull-ups, thinking the [almost] big-boy-like undies would encourage him to do it the "right" and "normal" way, but it turns out the pull-ups were introduced too early and he just didn't get it.  when he got a tad older I tried again, but because my timing was off from the get-go, it screwed it all up.


today, Sam wears night time pull ups to bed.  that kid sleeps like a brick.
I tried to wake him before I go to bed for a potty trip, but for awhile, waking him triggered night-terrors by messing up his REM sleep cycle ... so that was out.  if you have seen your child have a night-terror then you KNOW its just not worth it.

now its Elliott's turn.  I have not pressured him AT ALL about using the potty.  

it makes me think of my pre-kid days when hubby and I had dogs instead.  it was a big decision to get a 2nd dog, because before real, human kids, these are your kids.  turns out getting a puppy after already having a trained dog was the easiest thing ever; the baby copied his "big brother" with everything.  and so, his potty training wasn't even a chore.
I've been secretly hoping this would be the case with Elliott.  he is so in love with his brother and copies everything, just about.  these last couple of weeks he's been doing really good.  I've even taken him out to the store with undies on ... yes, its a big deal.  

of course there are accidents; we're still in the "be sure to bring extra everything" stage, but that's ok.  my officially/unofficial un-potty training is working out wonderfully.  its one of those things that every child gets ... eventually.  so why fight it?

do you have potty training secrets?  I'd love to hear them ... comment away.

Thankful Thursday

Blessed are those that can give without remembering and receive without forgetting.
Author Unknown

My top 10 for this week ...

  1. I <3 fireworks.  I look forward to it every year, and now that I have kids, I know that these are the times they will remember as adults ... because I do.
  2. I have a friend coming to visit ... the true-blue, soul-mate kind of friend.
  3. I am scoring BIG on craigslist freebies!
  4. Understanding parents.
  5. I chose a complex that has a swimming pool over one that has washer/dryer in the apartment.  NorCal summers are HOT!
  6. People who are flexible ... I used to HATE having to be flexible.  I was forced to be for years, but I'm realizing that you can live without it.
  7. Filtered water!  I've been drinking the tap water ... can't say I've missed that at all.
  8. Surprise packages on my doorstep.  Thanks mom!
  9. Having non-super-picky eating children ... I've heard the stories!  I've had to put together some interesting concoctions this week, and I didn't get any complaints.
  10. Getting a new dishwasher on Friday.  whoo hoo!
What are you thankful for?


say you are cat-sitting for a friend who is out of town for 3 short days ... what would you say the absolute worst thing could happen is?

yep, that happened to me.  the cat is now dead.

this may be news to some BUT cats do not have 9 lives.
at least a 2 month old kitten doesn't.
so little.  and so cute.  and so innocent.  and was in the wrong place at the wrong mili-second.

I am ... [indirectly] ... a cat killer.

my 2 kids were with me, because they looooooooove animals.  they have met this kitten before, with me and the owner present, and have been taught how to handle it, take turns with it, etc.  if they didn't have that "practice time" with the adults present, they are definitely the type of kids to love it too much ... and kill it that way instead.

they were playing with the kitten and someone *cough my 3 year old Elliott, cough* knocked into a tall speaker.  this speaker was not actually attached to anything, which is why it toppled easily.  the poor kitten was playing too and was more worried about where the boys were than anything, and just didn't see the speaker coming down on him.  compared to that kitten, the speaker was about 100x the size and it just crushed him.  literally.

I will spare you the details ... but once he lost control of his bladder/bowels, I knew the end was near.  he was alive when we got to the ER clinic, but it took just 2 seconds of the vets time to know it was best to put him to sleep.  the speaker had crushed his head.

it was an accident.  a freak accident.
but still ...

the kids saw the whole thing (obviously) and they both cried themselves to sleep that night.  me too for that matter.

what a week.

sour lemons

It is no coincidence that stressed is desserts backwards.

today I was dragging along.
partly because of the rain ... I mean it was pouring today.
its June!  c'mon Mother Nature.
not funny.

I have kids, so I can't just hibernate and excuse myself from the rest of the world.
they are the reason to keep going.
every single day.
with watching eyes, I am encouraged to set goals and follow through with them.
as tough as it may be is.

my heart is officially broken.
I can't seem to find all the pieces.

all this will be a memory one day.
a story to tell.
a testimony for someone to get encouraged by.

its a season where my skin gets thicker.
I become more aware of myself, my kids, my whole world.

its bittersweet
right now its more on bitter.

I'm so sick of lemons ... but this might help.

and now
my kids are in bed
I'm about to have a bowl of ice cream.

the end.

You Capture - Water & Purple

I love the blooms that come from lily pads.  so pretty.
when I think of or see lily pads, I think of toads & frogs, and when I think of or see toads & frogs, I think of Prince Charming ... and this was before Princess & The Frog.

(I'm actually not a fan of that movie; watched it once and the voo-doo struck a cord with me to make our first and last time watching it.)

Can't say I'd kiss one to find out if he was my Prince Charming ... would you?
I do like Kermit though. :)

These pictures were taken at the gardens at Turtle Bay in Redding, CA.  We seemed to have the place to ourselves.  it was very peaceful & just beautiful.



Thankful Thursday

"Drink and be thankful to the host! What seems insignificant when you have it, is important when you need it."  Franz Grillparzer

  1. I had some issues getting into an apartment last month, but happy & thankful to report, we are moving into a place tomorrow.
  2. There is a swimming pool there, and boy, we will definitely be using it this summer!  a lot.
  3. Help - the physical help to move & the emotional help to stay sane.
  4. My son NOT having night terrors for 2 months now.
  5. Optimism.
  6. Painted toenails ... this week, its purple.
  7. The song "clean up, clean up ... everybody clean up!"  it seems to work for my kids :)
  8. I have not killed the African Violet I got for Mother's Day ... my thumbs are not exactly green.
  9. When actions & words come together.
  10. Dancing to The Laurie Berkner Band with my kids!  I hope that is a childhood memory they keep.
It should be easy to find 10 things to be thankful for.  From the details of life to life's bigger, seasonal lessons learned -  blog it, and join us HERE @ Curious Georgi.

... its just apart of life ...

bedtime is a usual battle of the wills in our house.  your house too?
sometimes its just 1 or 2 times of me saying "ok, so what is our bedtime rule again?"  and unanimously they say "stay in bed"  so they get it ... but do they care?  other nights its more like 10-20 times.  sigh.

last night, after the usual 1-2 time lecture, Samuel comes out crying.  I knew it wasn't his "hurt cry," it wasn't his "freak out, I'm scared cry," it was one I wasn't too familiar with.  how funny, he's 6 1/2 years old and here's new one.

he comes out to hug me tightly and says, "mom, I don't want you to ever leave me.  I don't want you to die."  my heart instantly breaks.
I do my best to reassure him that part of my purpose for being alive is to be his mommy.  "God has a plan," is what I kept telling him, and reminded him of why we are thankful every night in our prayers for THIS day.

he has asked about death before, but without much concern.  for whatever reason he has taken it one step further.
I suppose I could look at it in a good way; he's thinking, he's applying principles and following through ... sort of.  but of course we all know where that "what-if thinking" gets us ... usually unnecessary anxiety.

I can't help but think of my favorite movie - Forrest Gump - and recite those words his mother told him as she lay in bed with cancer.  "death is just apart of life.  its something we're all destined to do."
I wouldn't say I'm comfortable with death, but when I think of it as the way God designed it, it brings a little more peace.  yes it will be sad to leave my loved ones, and enter in to an unknown, BUT I do look forward to meeting my Creator.

my 2 cents -
unless there is some freak accident, I don't have the sense my time to go is anytime soon. I have been told so many stories of that 6th sense kicking in when their time is near ... to me, that 6th sense is from God and its more than just a voice inside your head.

how have you handled the "death talk" with your kids?


I love love love when kids loose both of their upper-front teeth!  well, my big boy lost 1 of them tonight. he was SO SO SO excited!

they talk sort of funny, they sluuuuuuurp noodles (and whatever) else through there, but what I love the most is all the pictures.

those big 'ol grins without teeth.  maybe it reminds me of those baby pics ...  no need to worry, it is not triggering that!  no more babies for me.  really.

and here he is ... not willing to smile "normally" ... this may be his "normal" face ... I think he will be the class clown, don't you?

what does the tooth fairy bring your kids?

Thankful Thursday

If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, "thank you," that would suffice. 
~Meister Eckhart

  1. all the car drama was taken care of the way it was.  the what sucked, but the who, where, when, & how was ideal.
  2. a dear friend who is coming out of a very low season of her life.
  3. Here Is Love cd by Brian & Jenn Johnson ... I think you can download a song for free HERE.
  4. that there are enough diapers!
  5. all my baby steps are starting to make a difference.
  6. the sunshine finally showing up ...
  7. and the flip-flops that go along with that sunshine.
  8. Highlights magazine for the kids.
  9. chocolate ice cream.
  10. the willingness of those to write me encouraging & supportive recommendation letters ... and the hopes of getting a job close to home.
what are you thankful for?
Join us HERE at Curious Georgi.

funny boy

I start the kids' bedtime routine early most nights, like 7-730pm.
They share a room together (most nights a bed too), so I do this to get them to calm down a bit, and then I can hang out with them, read, play I Spy or 20 Questions for awhile.

tonight we're laying there and I ask them "if you could be any animal, what would you be?"
Sam goes through a bunch of different ones, and then

"I want to be a black momma"
"a snake of course"
"Sam, there is no snake called a black momma"
as if I misunderstood, he says -
"no, not A black mama the person, but THE black momma the snake"
"you're crazy.  there is no black momma snake"
"yes mom.  I wanna be a black momma!"

too funny.
so after I put them in bed and went to google just to find out what he's thinking about
fyi - its a black mamba :)