CA fear

so Steve, your comment got me thinking ...
being here in CA, I'm trying to analyze why I don't like it here. before it was just a gut feeling and I went with it, but being the introvert I am, I tend to sit back and watch what is around me.

a couple examples -
at the lake, we come with the basics - us in our suits, sunblock, few sand toys, towels, and a small cooler with snacks. everyone else has this, but it's times 10. not just bathing suits, but suits with UV tops along with hats and water shoes. not just a few sand toys, but what seems to be a playroom full of sand toys. not just a few drinks/snacks, a huge cooler full of food. umbrellas, chairs, boogie boards, goggles, floaties ... and on and on and on.

what if my kids want this, this, and that? better buy it all so they never complain ...

driving around south orange county, you will notice how perfect the landscaping is. everything is green, and it really is beautiful. but after awhile you notice that every single square inch is covered. planned for. used up. there is no area that I know of that is untouched. even the spaces on the on/off ramps to the freeway is landscaped. and watered regularly. there is not a tree in the whole county that doesn't have a steak holding up. God forbid a leaf falling on the ground. it's perfect. everyday.

what if we let nature take it's course? nope, water everything all the time ... even though there is a drought happening.

the kids are too "protected" with stuff; there is no room for sunburns, stubbed toes, or playing in the sand with your hands. the landscaping seems to be perfect so no one gets hurt walking down the street, tripping over a stick or something. no way to just walk on an unpaved pathway. no way your kids could go on a nature walk to find things for a craft project. why nothing when you can build another Starbucks?

there is no room for imagination. no free play. it's all chain stores. apparently there is something you "need" for every occasion. forget that, no occasion necessary. here, you just need it.

I'm sure it's not just SoCal, it's probably anywhere with money. people with money seem to live life based on their fears. as if money can cover it and make the it go away. I'm sure some think so.
there is a spiritual principal here; I'm sure there are more, it's just the one I'm sensitive to. its rubbed me the wrong way from the beginning. it seems that no one is comfortable with real life. all the "stuff" clutters it up. it's easy to identify yourself with your stuff, which is what people do here. the facade.

I pray for an awakening.


well, we're on the move again. not back to CA; same area of CO, just out of this particular house.
the bad news - hubby had to quit his job
some good news - hubby has begun his own business and so far, it's working!
more bad news - too late on rent to stay where we are. we had another garage sale to de-junk, then off into the in-laws basement. this also means we'll have to move it twice, again when we do move in somewhere else ... which SHOULD be when I get back home at the end of the month.
more good news - I'm thankful they're there!

I was nicely "sent" to CA to visit my family and friends while Matthew works on this business. missing your family when they're at home is hard and creates more pressure, missing your family while they're in another state is a bit easier to deal with. he needs to work 20 hours/day and feel guilt free about it. so here we are.
and I'm ok with hanging at the beach everyday!! I do miss it ... but I also know I do not want to live here again. it never did feel like home to me; I'm a WI girl. :)

SoCal is it's own little world, and you have to have money to survive. lots of it. to me, this place is just unrealistic. it feels fake. everyone has such a facade here, it's difficult to break through that to really get to know anyone. wonderful place to visit, and luckily we can, my parents will be here for the rest of their lives. for whatever reason, they love it here. I'm still kind of surprised I made it in 2008, but that's another story.

in a couple of weeks, we'll head up to NorCal. this place I love and miss, so I'm excited to visit. see you soon!!

if you have any fun and cheap ideas for fun, leave me a comment!