head and heart

I have to unload in a list; its seems this is how my brain will catch up with my heart ....

• I was blessed by sofas tonight.  yes used, but who cares?!  they were delivered, but more importantly, free.  my place is instantly more home-y.
• I am unintentionally developing a cleaning business on the side.  didn't see that coming because I don't really enjoy cleaning.  apparently everyone else hates it too, which is why they want someone else to do it.  whatever, its money.  come to think of it, Renew the View works for cleaning too, doesn't it?  oooooo, I think I like where this could go.
• but really, I NEED a real, steady, consistent job.  I wish I could go on like this until what I WANT to do happens, but that is fantasy.  I think I'm feeling guilty; I hate to be a mooch on anyone.
• this year is 1/2 over already ... not sure I've accomplished 1 of my resolutions.  boo on me.
• since I'm now broke, I have kept my same razor for awhile ... 2 thumbs up for Venus!  makes me think I could have kept other refills for a lot longer, because those suckers are expensive!  and btw, I'm totally converting to using a shampoo or conditioner to shave with over any shaving creme.  have you ever tried it?  you should.
• I have lost inspiration to pick up my camera anymore.  I hate to have lost this motivation, because I know that I don't take totally crappy photos ... no offensive ... but I can't seem to get IT back; whatever IT is.  why, why, why?
• not sure how I found the time, but I read a book ... in a matter of a few days.  soooooo not like me.  guess I found out something new about me.  it was a story about a female cabbie in England who [tries to] handle 5 lovers.  its not a detailed romance novel with a Fabio cover, but a love story none-the-less.  it could have easily been made into a movie.   I'm so not interested in having that life, yet I loved to read about it.  what does that mean?!
• I am really happy getting reconnected with people I had relationships with when I lived here a few years ago.  they don't like to hear of my circumstances, but still, I feel they still have their arms open for me.   thank you friends.
• Sam just had a night terror ... its been 3 months since his last one.  not sure what was different about today.  those are just plain not fun.
• my to-do list is still so long.  I was seeing progress, but the list is added to and added to and has become a million miles long again.  I wish I could live on 2 hours of sleep for awhile ... but that still might not be enough.  sigh.

• someone say a prayer for me.   thank you.