7 weeks

from the time I left the hospital until now, has gone by pretty fast.  I think because most of my days are blurry and now they just bleed together.  I've made sure we have no weekly commitments; I'd be late everytime!  I'm really trying to go with the flow, which is difficult for me.  I'm very much a planner and like to be organized.  throughout my house I see utter chaos ... but I know my kids are more important than a sparkling clean bathroom or that thick layer of dust on my dresser.  when I try, I can get us all fed, dressed, and ready to go by 10am.  not too bad, right?

big brother Sam is doing well with the adjustment.  he's very much a loner child, so he's not missing playing with friends ... sadly he doesn't really have any anyway.  he is much more social with adults - our friends and complete strangers alike - and he's always telling people "we have a new baby, his name is Eli (sounds like E-why)."  he's so proud.  I can tell he can't wait until Eli can actually play with him.

I finally got a smile last week.  that's pretty exciting to me; it's a milestone.  I haven't been able to capture a picture of it though, hopefully soon.  any smiling baby is the cutest thing in the world, it's those gums!  and of course I now am talking to him in that high-pitched voice so I can see more of those precious smiles.  "they" say babies are attracted to that high-pitch noise, but it seems people talk that way automatically anyway, not because of what research says.  what do you think?  isn't it funny?

I love my kids ... it's still strange to me that I now have 2.  I never really dreamed or fantasized about being a mommy, it was just one of those things that I knew would happen one day - but that's where I stopped thinking about it.  like my marriage and wedding; I knew I'd get married one day but never had a fairytale wedding planned out beforehand.  is that strange?  I wouldn't call myself a girly girl, as a child or now.  I guess I had better things to do like play school with my stuffed animals!